The Hollywood Treatment
by Tigereye77
Summary: What happens when Hollywood decides who should play our BAU team in an upcoming movie and what do each member think of the potential casting? Really a team fic and pure fluff.


**A/N: I seem to be on a one shot roll! This is just pure fluff. But who would play our beloved Team should they make a Hollywood movie about them? And how would our crime fighters react to who Hollywood wants in their roles? Pure fluff.**

Aaron Hotchner's mouth thinned into a line of disapproval as he listened to Section Chief Erin Strauss explain the reason for why she had called a meeting with his entire team.

"It seems Agent Rossi's friend Bob Blakely's book "Inside the BAU" has been optioned for a screenplay. The script is completed and financing approved," Strauss said.

"Approved for what?" Reid asked in confusion.

"For a movie," Strauss replied grimly. "They're already beginning to cast it."

"Wait," Garcia cried out in excitement. "They're actually going to make a movie about us?"

"Well, considering the book was about this team, it seems there's a good shot of that," Hotch replied grimly.

"And the Director is okay with all this?" JJ asked the older woman.

"He did approve the book, which cast this team and the Agency in an extremely flattering light." She paused a moment. "And between us, he's ecstatic over who they have signed to play Agent Prentiss. It seems he's a big fan."

Emily looked warily at the other woman. "Do I even want to know who it is?"

Strauss' lips quirked. "Angelina Jolie."

"Ooooh, that's actually good casting," Garcia gushed.

"One foxy lady to play our own foxy lady," Morgan teased as he winked at his blushing friend.

Hotch stared at the lovely brunette and a slight smile appeared on his face. In his eyes, Angelina Jolie didn't do Emily justice.

"Who do they have to play me?" Garcia demanded.

Strauss sighed. "I don't know, I only know about Agent Prentiss because of the Director's…fondness for the actress. He probably would have approved the film anyway because he liked Mr. Blakely's book. I just thought I would inform you about this and remind everyone that should this movie actually begin to film, it's highly likely you'll all be contacted to provide some insight for the actors into the roles they will be playing. Please remember, all such request must go through the proper departmental channels first." Strauss gazed hard at each of them.

"We will remember the proper protocols," Hotch assured her. Satisfied with that promise, Strauss nodded her head and left the roundtable room.

For a moment after she left, the room was silent, and then Morgan turned to Garcia, "Baby Girl, see if you can find out who else they're talking about casting in this movie."

Garcia was already firing up her laptop and typing into her search engine. "Already doing it Brown Sugar and we have a winner."

Everyone but Hotch and Emily started to crowd around Garcia. The Unit Chief looked at them disapprovingly, saving his harshest look for Rossi who had started it all by allowing his friend access to the team in the first place.

"I don't think this is a good use of our time at work," Hotch said in his dry voice.

"Oh, like you're not curious who they're thinking about casting for your role," Rossi shot back.

"Not in the least," Hotch retorted.

"Fine, then we won't tell you who it is," Rossi replied airily.

"It's actually a really good actor," Reid interjected. "I think you'd be happy with this choice."

Hotch looked over at Emily. Since Angelina Jolie was cast in the Prentiss role, he figured this would be a sleek and sexy movie meant to attract both the teenage and older crowd. Considering the actors around his age, he figured they might try to get someone like Robert Downey, Jr. or Christian Bale. He liked both actors. He knew they could do dark and broody. Bale, while younger, might actually be the better option to play him and he would look fabulous on screen with Angelina-

"Tom Hanks."

Hotch's thoughts came to a screeching halt. He blinked. He must not have heard right. "Who?"

"Tom Hanks," JJ repeated. "They're negotiating with Tom Hanks to play you Hotch."

"He's a great actor," Emily nodded.

"Yeah, he was awesome in 'Cast Away'," Garcia chimed in, "And I love him in the Da Vinci Code movies."

Hotch agreed that Tom Hanks was an incredible actor but wasn't he…older? And a little heavier? And while he have heard some women call the man attractive, come on! He wasn't exactly likely to be getting it on with Angelina Jolie onscreen!

"JJ, they have two actresses in mind to play you," Garcia continued. "Amanda Seyfried or Kate Hudson."

JJ wrinkled her nose. "Isn't one too young and the other, well, come on Kate Hudson was in that horrible rom-com you dragged me and Emily to Pen."

"You're going to have to get more specific, JJ, all of Kate Hudson's rom-coms have been pretty bad," Emily snickered. "Amanda Seyfried isn't bad. She's cute."

"Cute and blonde. Is that all they were looking for when they thought about who to cast for me? What about somebody with more substance?" JJ fumed.

"Well, who did you want?" Rossi asked. "Helen Mirren?"

"They've got her for Strauss' role," Garcia informed them.

"Seriously?" Morgan asked in disbelief.

"Well, we know Mirren can play the ice queen," JJ muttered.

"Wow, Reid, you're not going to believe who they're talking to for you," Garcia breathed out.

"Who?" the young genius asked as he tried to read Garcia's computer screen.

"Robert Pattison."

"Who?"

Garcia and JJ rolled their eyes at the blank looks on the men's faces.

"Hello?" Garcia drawled out in exasperation. "Edward from the Twilight movies?"

"Isn't he a little young?" Emily asked.

"But hot," Garcia replied. She patted a befuddled Reid's arm. "Trust me, sugar, it's a compliment they have him to play you."

"If he gets Robert Pattison, I want Reese Witherspoon," JJ huffed out, still annoyed by the two actresses they were looking at for her role. She was not some blonde lightweight! Emily got kick ass Oscar winner Angelina Jolie for heaven's sakes!

"Okay, Baby Girl, I'm next," Morgan said. "Who have they got to play me?"

"Well, my luscious Chocolate God, they have yet another Academy Award winning actor for your role. It says they are this close to signing Denzel Washington."

Morgan froze for a moment and then he smiled. "He's a little older than me, but Denzel is cool. I like that that casting."

Hotch was still wondering why they went for Tom Hanks for him. He didn't think he ever saw Tom Hanks do broody. Nor kick down doors. You know, Morgan wasn't the only one who could kick down a door. Hotch had kicked down a few himself too and still does. If they wanted an older actor why not go with Liam Neeson. Hotch liked Liam Neeson. Good actor and he could play the badass kicking down doors.

"Okay Kitten," Rossi asked. "Me next."

"You Agent Rossi will be played by Tommy Lee Jones."

Rossi gazed at her in shock and then started swearing. "He's not even Italian!"

"He's a terrific actor, Rossi," Emily laughed. "And he's sexy, in an older man kinda way."

"I think he's older than me too," Rossi snarled out. "What is this? They're going older with the guys and younger with the women."

"Welcome to Hollywood," JJ drawled out in disgust. She muttered under her breath, "They couldn't try to get Scarlett Johansson?"

"Who do they have playing you Garcia?"

"Well, you know they couldn't find any actress that can duplicate my awesomeness, so I will have to settle for being played by Scarlett Johansson." Garcia looked around the room with a smug expression.

"Wait! You got Scarlett Johansson!" JJ shrieked. "And I'm stuck with either Kate Hudson or Amanda Seyfried?"

"JJ, there's nothing wrong with either of those two actresses, they're cute," Rossi tried to soothed the outraged woman.

"Again with the cute! There's more to me than cuteness!" JJ raged.

"Who's Edward in 'Twilight' and what exactly is 'Twilight'?" Reid asked no one in particular.

Or Jon Hamm from "Mad Men", Hotch thought. Now, he could go deep and broody. Plus he had dark features. Yeah, Hamm would have been pretty good casting for him.

"You guys are taking this all too seriously," Emily laughed.

"Easy for you to say," JJ snapped. "They have Angelina Jolie playing you!"

"Nothing is set in stone," Emily continued. "Financing could fall through. Actors drop out. They could decide not to make the movie." She stood up. "I'm going back to work and not worry about something that has a slim chance of happening any time soon." She strolled out of the room and back to her desk, still chuckling at her teammates' reactions.

Emily truly didn't think much would come of this movie. Projects were delayed or dropped all the time. It wasn't something she was going to worry about now. As she sat down at her desk, she picked up the file she had been working on before Hotch called them into the conference room. She was just starting to get back into her file when her phone rang. Without taking her eyes from the paperwork before her, she reached over and picked up the receiver.

"Prentiss."

"Emily Prentiss?"

"Yes."

"Please hold for Angelina Jolie."

_Oh crap_.

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><p><strong>AN 2: ****Don't forget that the 2nd Annual Profilers Choice Award for Criminal Minds fiction is now open for nominations. The ballots are found in the discussion forum (when in the list of stories for the CM fan fiction section, look to the top right hand corner of your screen and you'll see a link for "Discussion Forums"), Chit Chat on Authors Corner, 2011 Profilers Choice CM Awards - Nomination Ballot.**

**Thanks again for reading, and please leave some feedback if you can. Merci!**


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